sunshowerdandelion: (book)
Sunshowersy ([personal profile] sunshowerdandelion) wrote2024-09-16 04:27 pm
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Day 123.1: Neurotic Relaxing

As someone who's probably a neurotic, who tends to worry and get into ruts of worry, allowing myself to relax is one of my chief challenges. I think my recent 'slowing down' with writing is part of this: Whenever I feel incoming worry, I have this overwhelming urge to act, when actually sometimes things are impossible to control. Hence, when I write, and I feel that pain of a scene gestating, I have a tendency to run away or try to avoid it somehow. Sometimes the only way out is through, or through waiting. I'm definitely still learning that.

As such it's very, very difficult for me to spend an afternoon... playing games. I'm trying to do that now. It is not going well. My brain keeps saying (guiltily): You should be working, you should be reading, you should be writing. But no I want to relax with games.

I want to relax with games!

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