Day 136.1: Stuck!
Sep. 29th, 2024 08:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Still stuck on the first scene my gosh.Is this going to be a 3-month thing, like when (extremely reaching comparison) Flaubert spent that amount of time getting the fair scene right in Madame Bovary? I hope not, but if that's what it involves, I'm definitely going to do it. I think the main problem is with (a) tone, Seiran being very hostile and not at all supine (although this is lesser) and (b) the demonstration of powers by Kaguya seeming to come across as a threat instead of as a demonstration of powers.
I'll need to spend a lot of walks figuring how to get Kaguya to be less hostile (which might be a matter of conveying what she wants? She seems to want a demonstration of majesty, with a little of the sublime rather than threats, which Seiran will construe as a threat), and getting Seiran to be more demure in her expression of things. Also making Seiran a little more jokey.
Best of luck to me!
Also I spent the whole day reading Elizabeth Brundage's very long character study in All Things Cease To Appear.
I'll need to spend a lot of walks figuring how to get Kaguya to be less hostile (which might be a matter of conveying what she wants? She seems to want a demonstration of majesty, with a little of the sublime rather than threats, which Seiran will construe as a threat), and getting Seiran to be more demure in her expression of things. Also making Seiran a little more jokey.
Best of luck to me!
Also I spent the whole day reading Elizabeth Brundage's very long character study in All Things Cease To Appear.